Pretty Cool.
You know, when you see your child rocket out of the birth canal, you feel a certain something. I won't call it love, because it's not, but I will call it a sense of, "goddamn, there it is". I'm not saying this as some sort of fatalistic, this is the end of my manhood and sowing wild oats period, stupid shit. I'm saying it in the kind of fatalistic, this is my progeny and half of it is me and this is as close as I will get to immortality and I HAVE to die one day so this is just as good, so long as I educate this motherfucker right.
Tonight, I let the kids stay up as long as they wanted, provided they were quiet enough. Kiernan crapped out pretty early, at 1030 PM. Gavin maintained and it was pretty cool, I had some one on one time with my oldest, and that is always good. I showed him pictures of my parents and tried to explain to him that my parents are dead and that, despite this, they would have liked to see him.
To see the gears of a four year old attempt to grapple with mortality after I showed him pictures of his Grandma and Grandpa, brought tears to my eyes.
I ameliorated my sadness by: drinking more, and assuring him that by the time that he gets as old as I am, science will probably have solved the problem of aging so, that while I will probably grow feeble and die, that he will not.
It felt good.
Tonight, I let the kids stay up as long as they wanted, provided they were quiet enough. Kiernan crapped out pretty early, at 1030 PM. Gavin maintained and it was pretty cool, I had some one on one time with my oldest, and that is always good. I showed him pictures of my parents and tried to explain to him that my parents are dead and that, despite this, they would have liked to see him.
To see the gears of a four year old attempt to grapple with mortality after I showed him pictures of his Grandma and Grandpa, brought tears to my eyes.
I ameliorated my sadness by: drinking more, and assuring him that by the time that he gets as old as I am, science will probably have solved the problem of aging so, that while I will probably grow feeble and die, that he will not.
It felt good.
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