Lunchtime

Pretty sure Christ would approve of this.

I'll just leave this here. Man, the South rules if you're white and christian.

One More Time Around

I don't think I'll have any pictures today. No, I fucking lied.


I made some fried chicken yesterday. I'm not talking about the shit you get at KFC or some other fucking place. I'm talking about in the kitchen, fucking up a chicken carcass, breading the motherfucker and then pan frying the bitch. I'm talking about work. And cayenne pepper, loads of that shit. This is one of the most southern of dishes you could possibly hope to eat. Healthy? Fuck no. Lots of work? Damn straight. Delicious? Hell fuck yes.

And that's what the fuck I am talking about. As a kid I had fried chicken, as described above, probably once a week. And not just the chicken either. We had mashed potatoes, or rice, and gravy, bread of some sort, iced tea/lemonade, and some kind of vegetable. And let's not forget the dessert.

What I'm saying is that my parents worked their asses off to give me some good shit that I didn't appreciate at the time. In fact, I complained to the high heavens about having to eat chicken "again". I was a fuckhole, a total ingrate motherfucker. I was everything that was wrong with the human species and I had no problem with it.

I regret that shit, like a motherfucker. Yeah, my parents weren't perfect, they did stupid things, just like everyone else, but sometimes I wish that they were still around so that I could tell them that they were right about a lot of shit and that I'm sorry for being such a dick all the time.

Alaska Verdicts 2

A little fish is still a catch, motherfucker.

I laughed out loud when I heard the news today about former Wasilla representative Vic Kohring. The Anchorage Daily News has the full story here.

I won't go into the all details as you can read them for yourself but I just wanted to point out that throughout the trial Mr. Kohring's lawyer never said that his client was innocent, just that he was a little fish in all the corruption goings-on. It's not like he took a lot of money so why the hell would anyone convict him? He only broke the law a little bit. He just took small bribes. He's just a degenerate, fucking scum-sucker who was too stupid to ask for more money, so take it easy on him. Shit, with arguments like that maybe I should get into the law business.

The best part is that after the whole corruption scandal broke and it was found that Mr. Kohring was part of it all, albeit a little fish, I saw the motherfucker at the 4th of July parade in Wasilla and he was walking behind a trailer that had a sign on it that said, "Vic Kohring: Hardworking Conservative" and the asshole was passing out Crunch bars and shaking hands. Too bad, Vic, I guess I can't be swayed by shitty chocolate to look the other way while you shit on the public trust. Fuck him, I didn't vote for the son of a bitch anyway. Fucking cocksucker.

Alaska Verdicts 1

If you are one of those people who was never curious enough to peep your own anus in the mirror, this is what you missed.

Former Representative Pete Kott is going to the clink. The Anchorage Daily News has the full story here. The jury found Mr. Kott guilty on three charges: bribery, extortion and conspiracy. I guess they didn't really care for his defense of, "Man, I was fucking wasted all the time. I had no fucking clue who was giving me what." I thought that, if nothing else, that argument took balls. I mean, he never said he was innocent just that he was a lush. I will admit that the motherfucker has a pair on him.

Sentencing is set for Dec. 7 and I'll be sure to keep updating on these sons of bitches. Next up: Vic Kohring and his trial date of Oct. 22.